Showing posts with label Modernity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Modernity. Show all posts

Friday, January 01, 2021

A modern perspective on Sex - Jane Goldman

 


You bet! You see, the hormones that cause all the physical changes in your body during puberty dont just make you sprout hairs and suchlike. They also get working on your brain quite apart from that, sex is jolly interesting, and thinking about it can be a very nice, exciting thing to do with your spare time! Even if you can believe that you"re perfectly healthy and normal, thinking about sex all the time can still make you feel uneasy, because you can feel that you're losing control of your brain.


I often imagine having sex with people I know, or famous people. I really enjoy it. Is it okay?

Its called fantasising. Its more than okay, and nearly everybody does it at some time in their life. It"s just like daydreaming, only its main purpose is to make you feel excited in a sexual way. Fantasising is a fantastically healthy way to discover more about your own sexual feelings, so you should never feel guilty about doing it.


others with strong religious beliefs that sex and the sexual organs only existed in order for married people to make babies, and that using the genitals for any kind of sexual pleasure B especially outside of marriage B was Asinful@. There are still people about who think the same way. Of course, everyone is entitled to their won beliefs, but people also have a right to know the truth. Facts are facts, and the plain truth is that masturbations is not harmful.


Some parents have very strong views that young people shouldn"t have sex at all, or that sex should be saved for marriage. Changing their minds is likely to be impossible. In cases like this, you"re best off keeping some things secret, but that doesn"t mean you should sneak around and go against what they say.


If you"re considering taking a relationship further i.e. Having sex not just for the first time but any time, you should always ask yourself these questions

Do I really like, fancy, care about or maybe even love my prospective partner?

Do they like fancy, care about or maybe even love me, too?

If I don"t feel like I want to have sex now, would my partner be prepared to wait until I do?

Am I certain that my partner is okay about us using a condom?

Have I or my partner got a condom already, or is one of us prepared to go out and buy some before we decide to have sex?


What if I don"t get a chance to think carefully before I have sex?

That happens. You might be in a very intimate situation - alone with someone, having a passionate snogging and petting session and suddenly you realise that you"re on the verge of losing your virginity. In these cases, you just have to go with your gut instinct do you really want to do it? Not because all your friends have, not because you"re scared of losing your partner, not because you figure you might as well now you"re this close to it, nor because your worried about being a tease if you back out, but because you really, really want to experience sex and closeness with this person, right now? If the answer is a definite yes, then as long as one of you has a condom ready to use, there"s no reason why you shouldnt go ahead.

. . . 

Sex for sex's sake can be wonderful between two people who think the same way.

Source: Sex: How? Why? What? The Teenagers Guide, Jane Goldman Penguin Books, London


Search This Blog